023 The Eyes Have It


(Office ambience)

A:陈豪,Do you have a few minutes to talk?

C:Sure, 有什么事吗?

A:I noticed something in our meeting just now. 做为朋友,我觉得应该告诉你。It has to do with good etiquette.

C: 我有什么地方做得不对吗?西方礼节对我来说还有些陌生,你可得随时提醒我。

A: It has to do with body language, specifically eye contact.

C:肢体语言?Amy, 你能说得具体点儿吗?

A:We send nonverbal messages with our arms, our legs, our posture, our gestures and most often with our eyes.


A:没错。比方说,今天开会时,your eyes said more than your words or your facial expression. Todd 介绍提案时,我能看出你不同意他的意见。

C:奥, 你从我眼睛就能看出来?我真的是有异议。可你看出来的?我可是一字都没说呀。

A: You didn't have to. You rolled your eyes.

C: 我翻眼睛了吗?我怎么一点儿都没觉得。

A:你是下意识的。You were not aware, but several people at the meeting noticed.

C:那就是说虽然我嘴上没表示反对,其它人还是能够看出来。Was there anything else that I did with my eyes?

A:Unfortunately, yes. You looked away several times while Todd was speaking.


A:没错。By not looking at Todd, you gave the impression that you had heard it all before and were not the least bit interested in hearing more.


A:Well, your eyes did that for you.

C: Amy, 你还从我的眼神儿里看出什么了?

A:When you lost complete interest in what Todd was saying, you just stared at him blankly. It was that old "deer in the headlights" look.


A:For the deer facing the headlights of an oncoming car, its expression is one of looking, but not seeing.


A:That's right. The courteous professional is as conscious of his body language as he is his spoken language.

C: Amy, 你能不能再提醒我一下,以后要怎么做,省得我的眼睛把我的想法都泄漏出去了。

A:记住,眼睛是心灵的窗口。Learning to control the message that your eyes send is the key to courteous communication.